A Catholic perspective on current events

Intelligence and couple relationship

Who is smarter, the person who knows how to do complicated mathematical and financial calculations, or the one who manages to have a united and happy family where the wife, husband and children are at ease at home?

José María Contreras

January 16, 2022

intelligence and partners

As a general rule, a person who knew how to solve complicated technical problems or intricate philosophical reasoning has always been considered intelligent.

With the passage of time has come super-specialization, which basically consists of knowing a great deal about almost nothing.

We are finding ourselves in a society in which some people have a very high level of knowledge in small areas of knowledge, but in the long run they do not know, and it seems that they are not interested in seeing, the reality as a whole.

Thus, as is logical, we follow in society, in matters vital to our lives, the opinions of people who are famous for other subjects.

Their opinions are often taken by the rest of us as unquestionable. We trust those who say them because of their prestige, because of their popularity, as if they were wise in the matter, but the reality is that they know no more than the average citizen.

To this is added the classical view that "the intelligent person is the one who goes further with reason than others"; a definition that, however classical it may be, is still a reductionism since, in addition to a rational one, there are other types of intelligence.

One of these types of intelligence is emotional intelligence, but there is also social intelligence, numerical intelligence, spatial intelligence...

Let us ask ourselves: who is smarter, the person who knows how to do complicated mathematical and financial calculations, or the one who manages to have a united and happy family where the wife, husband and children are at ease at home?

To grant the criterion of intelligence only to what we take for intellectual is, in my opinion, a mistake.

The person must have a vision of his life as a whole; he cannot be divided into work, family, friendships, hobbies... He must know how to intelligently unite all these facets that make up a person's life; if he does not, he will never achieve a full life.

"It's just that to become a top scientist you have to be very smart," one might reply.

And to harmonize a happy family, don't you also have to be very intelligent?

Let's look at society and draw conclusions.

The most intelligent always has a moderately complete view of reality.

No one will be able to achieve a harmonious family if he or she does not have this vision in his or her life.

In order to achieve a satisfying life, emotional intelligence must be trained.

Don't you think we spend too much time training rational intelligence and little or none on emotional intelligence?  

The closer we are to what human beings are really looking for, even if they don't know it, the easier it will be for us to lead a reasonably happy life.  

For that you have to learn, be trained, acquire solid knowledge, not the stereotypes that often model a society and that do not make people happier, but more manipulable.

Let us not forget that the training of the other intelligences, without neglecting the rational one, will give us more happiness as people, which, after all, is what we are.

Listen to the podcast "Love and intelligence".

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